Margins

I haven't really been too concerned with the number of pages I am writing. However, when I just went to BC's website to look up some format regulations for tables, I discovered that my top and left hand margins need to be 1.5 inches. . .it felt good to add about 10 pages to my dissertation in a matter of seconds. Woohoo.
Things are coming together nicely. The methods chapter is being revised and Chapter 4 is almost ready to be sent to my committee for more revisions. The beautiful weather in Boston today really helped to keep me positive and focused.
We just ordered some Thai food and I am having a glass of wine to celebrate. Tomorrow it is back to Maine. . .I am sad, but motivated.

Chapter 4, draft 1 complete

I finished the first draft of Chapter 4!! It feels good, but I also know that I have to do some major rearranging because the format I started out with just didn't work for the whole thing. I am meeting with R today to discuss the layout. At least the content is done and on paper. Larry and I are going to start playing around with the order of things (when he wakes up). He is a great editor and a tremendous help. I think we are going to tackle it the old fashioned way. . .I am going to print out all 67 pages and we are going to take the scissors to it. This is one project the cats can not be part of. They would just love to roll around on all those pages!
More to come later. . .

Snowfall totals

I need the snowfall total for this winter. Anyone know what it is? Anyone know where I can find it? It will add greatly to chapter 4. . .okay not so much, but there is one line where I say how much snow we were under this winter. . .could add some flavor to this dry account of my research. Help!

Finding my voice

I am plugging away at the writing of Chapter 4. It is slow, but I am making progress. I feel like my biggest challenge right now is finding my voice. In dissertation seminar we talked about writing in first person and how that is how more and more dissertations are being written. Of course this feels more natural and is much easier to write, but I feel like I am breaking rules. I just read a little of “Writing up Qualitative Research” and of course Wolcott says to use first person and set the stage with lots of thick description, but I am worried that my dissertation will be perceived as a piece of creative writing if I get too into that description. I know the style that I want to write my book in, but I'm not sure if my committee will think that style is appropriate for this piece. I think my approach is going to be to write it the way that feel natural and then go back later and change the language if needed. And then I will save all of my drafts so I can refer back to them when I am preparing the manuscript.

Words from the Wise

“Who are you who will read these words and study these photographs, and through what cause, by what chance, and for what purpose, and by what right do you qualify to, and what will you do about it.” (James Agee Let Us Now Praise Famous Men, p.9)

150 Things Not to Do At the Defense (Okay, 61 Things)

1. "Charge the mound" when a professor beans you with a high fast question.
2. Describe parts of your dissertation using interpretive dance.
3. "Musical accompaniment provided by..."
4. Stage your own death/suicide.
5. Lead the spectators in a Wave.
6. Have a sing-a-long.
7. "You call THAT a question? How the hell did they make you a professor?"
8. Have bodyguards outside the room to "discourage" certain professors from sitting in.
9. Puppet show.
10. Sell T-shirts to recoup the cost of copying, binding, etc.
11. Have a bikini-clad model be in charge of changing the overheads.
12. "Everybody rumba!!"
13. "And it would have worked if it weren't for those meddling kids..."
14. Charge a cover and check for ID.
15. Smoke machines, dramatic lighting, pyrotechnics...
16. Use a Super Soaker to point at people.
17. No show.
18. Door prizes and a raffle.
19. "Please phrase your question in the form of an answer..."
20. "And now, a word from our sponsor..."
21. Table dance (you or an exotic dancer).
22. "Yo, a smooth shout out to my homies..."
23. "I'd like to thank the Academy..."
24. Pass the collection basket.
25. Two-drink minimum.
26. Black tie only.
27. Release a flock of doves.
28. Defense by proxy.
29. "There will be a short quiz after my presentation..."
30. Food fight.
31. Challenge a professor to a duel. Slapping him with a glove is optional.
32. Halftime show.
33. Sell those big foam "We're number #1" (sic) hands.
34. Pass out souvenir matchbooks.
35. Post signs: "Due to a computer error at the Registrar's Office, the original room is not available, and the defense has been relocated to(Made-up non-existent room number)"
36. Make each professor remove an item of clothing for each question he asks.
37. Have a make-your-own-sundae table during the defense.
38. Do a soft-shoe routine.
39. Use a Greek Chorus to highlight important points.
40. "I'm sorry Professor Smith, I didn't say 'SIMON SAYS any questions?'.You're out."
41. Hold a pre-defense pep rally, complete with cheerleaders, pep band,and a bonfire.
42. Shadow puppets.
43. Put your overheads on a film strip. Designate a professor to be in charge of turning the strip when the tape recording beeps.
44. "OK, everybody - heads down on the desk until you show me you can behave."
45. Call your advisor "sweetie".
46. Have everyone pose for a group photo.
47. Instant replay.
48. Laugh maniacally.
49. Answer every question with a question.
50. Hand out 3-D glasses.
51. "I don't know - I didn't write this."
52. Before your defense, build trapdoors underneath all the seats.
53. Roll credits at the end. Include a "key grip", and a "best boy".
54. Hide.
55. "Well, I saw it on the Internet, so I figured it might be a good idea..."
56. Flash "APPLAUSE" and "LAUGHTER" signs.
57. Mosh pit.
58. Hang a sign that says "Thank you for not asking questions"
59. Swoop in with a cape and tights, Superman style.
60. Hold a raffle.
61. "You think this defense was bad? Let me read this list to show you what I COULD have done..."

The Center for Responsible Hydration

I have been drinking Defense Vitamin Water in preparation for my dissertation defense. I am hopeful that it will have a postive impact.

Calzolaio Pasta Co.

Is it Thursday again all ready? Does that mean I can avoid my work to do another thank you? Yes! Tonight I would like to thank all of my new friends at Calzolaio Pasta Co. in Wilton. This is an amazing restaurant with delicious food and wine. I have been going there on Wednesday nights for dinner and reality TV. Everyone there is so friendly and funny and they have no idea how much they have helped me through this process. It is nice to look forward to amazing food and good company every week. All you ANTM fans, please join us on Wednesday nights at 8:00. Come earlier for dinner. If you are reading this, then you might also want to come and have dinner with me and talk about my dissertation (or NOT!!!).

So thank you again CPC staff. This is a great restaurant and has become one of my favorite coping mechanisms. I think this will continue long after the degree is complete!

The Cycle Continues

Yesterday I started talking about the cycles that are prevalent in all of the contexts my study looks at. I have two more contexts to think about today: family and personal identity (self). In the family, the cycle that seemed to present itself was one of negative influences leading to negative behaviors. For some of my participants and many of the educators, it seemed like the family is very influential. It is from a young age that people begin developing their scripts, which are the cognitive structures that influence how we think the world operates. The scripts we create for how "typical life" should be will stick with us throughout development. So, if there are negative influences in the home (or low expectations), scripts are developed around these negative influences and/or low expectations. Children begin to believe that what they have experienced is the way the world works. This can be detrimental to their progress in some cases.

On a personal level there are also cycles that are hard to break. Some educators talked about the personal choices adolescents make regarding relationships and how they play out for better or worse. For example, a teen chooses a partner who is educated, then they become pregnant and have a child, then they must work to provide for the child abandoning ideas for higher education, and without education they are likely to remain in poverty. Another cycle that was emphasized by my adolescent participants was around confidence and determination. They talked about hearing from others that they can't make it and eventually believing what they are hearing and not doing what they set out to do.

Now the question: how do we interrupt these cycles to create new pathways that allow them to rise up out of poverty?

"A cycle that you really can't break"

A recurring theme in my results section is the presence of cycles. Carla is the one who pointed out to me that these are really prevalent and that they are what underlies everything. I am creating a model and basically, the underlying variables (cycles, money, and definitions of success) interact with the variables in specific contexts of the adolescent's life (family, school, rural communty, and personal identity) to yield outcomes. In quantitative terms, I am suggesting that the cycles are moderators between the contextual factors and outcomes. Of course I have no intention of quantifying these data and showing statistically how there is an interaction between these variables. However, I think I can demonstrate the same relationship with these data.

These cycles are present in each of the four contexts mentioned above. In the Rural community the most prevalent cycle is the car--> job cycle. Basically, an adolescent needs a job, but in order to get that job she needs a car, and then the job becomes necessary to afford the car and no financial progress is made because all the money earned goes directly to the car. There are also cycles that revolve around transportation related to health care. One must travel to be able to use Mainecare, but without transportation one can not get health care, and if one misses several appointments due to lack of transportation, he is no longer able to receive health care with that provider. As one of my participants said "the system doesn't acknowledge the barriers and try to develop the infrastructure to minimize the barriers." So the negative outcomes of living in poverty are perpetuated.

The cycles in the educational setting are also frustrating. Both the educators and the students talked about tracking in the schools. Essentially, low income students are more likely to be in lower tracks for academic classes (even when they match their peers academically). If low income students are placed in lower academic tracks, this impacts their academic preparedness, which in turn impacts success in higher education, which impacts persistence and attrition rates, which means they aren't completing their educations and getting out of poverty. Similarly, students who are homeless face attendance issues. Some schools have attendance policies that do not award credit to students if they miss a certain number of days of school, this means that they are not graduating, not going on to higher education, and staying in poverty.

Tomorrow I will discuss the cycles on a familial and personal level.

I Am Just a Poor Boy Though My Story's Seldom Told

A great article about chronic poverty and its effects on the brain. This is a summary of the original paper that was in this week's Proceedings on the National Academy of Sciences.

http://www.economist.com/science/displaystory.cfm?story_id=13403177

Outline Done!

I now have a working outline for Chapter 4!!! This is good news because it means I can start writing. It is overwhelming because I'm not sure that I have anything meaningful to say. I am keeping my eyes on the prize though!

Thanksgiving Thursday

I am starting a new weekly posting called "Thanksgiving Thursday." I know it is a little too soon to start thanking people (because it isn't actually over yet). However, it is time to start recognizing the people who are getting me through this. My first official thank you is going to Larry. Larry has been part of this all since I applied to doctoral programs. There have been many times when I have questioned what I am doing and doubted that I could survive some of the politics of academia. Larry has always supported me. Larry also listens to me (and engages in conversations with me) when I talk about poverty and all of the things on my mind. Without this constant dialogue, I would not have gotten to this place. I am very lucky. So, on this first Thursday of April I thank you, Larry Ronco.

Roll the credits

A huge part of research is confidentiality and protecting the identity of one's participants. I completely understand the need for this (I had an assistantship with the IRB) and I think it is very important. However, I am feeling a dilemma related to the fact that my participants said some brilliant things and I am using their words over and over again, and somehow two little quotation marks just don't seem like enough to give credit to those who provided the words and thoughts. I have so much respect and admiration for the educators whom I interviewed and the students in the groups that analyzed the data. I know it is my job to analyze, synthesize, and present the findings in a way that gives them voice and does justice to their contributions, but naming them might be important too. Here I am, asserting that the rural poor are a quieted and oppressed group that are too far away to be heard, and yet I am keeping them hidden myself. I just have to reconcile this for myself and find a way to recognize them without revealing their identities. But how do I do that?